No Santa Claus' Allowed!
by FanofBellaandEdward
Summary: Six years after the disastrous event known as Teddy visiting Santa, Harry decides to visit one again with his son. But it looks like Santa and Malfoys are not meant to mix at all. Sequel to Malfoys and Santa Don't Mix Well; Christmas oneshot; Harry's Pov; mentioned MPreg; smidgen of violence; very implied mature scene; Santa being too touchy-feely; awkward pick-up lines; slash


**Author's note: I wish you all a Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/Insert holiday that you celebrate.**

 **Due to a couple of quite shitty weeks at university, I only managed to finish this oneshot last night *sweatdrops* Anyway, this is a sequel to Malfoys and Santa Claus Don't Mix Well. You don't really have to read it to be able to follow this one, but it could help, considering there are some references to the previous one in it.**

 **Warnings: Harry's pov; smidgen of violence courtesy of a pissed off little Malfoy; Santa being inappropriate; mentioned MPreg (very briefly); implied mature scene (so implied, it barely appears; for full version, please visit my profile for more information); established slash; awkward pick-up lines**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling owns it.**

 **Dedicated to: babyvfan for giving me the idea!**

 **I hope you'll like it!**

* * *

 **No Santa Claus' Allowed!**

The sound of coffee brewing filled the kitchen, together with the sound of bacon sizzling in the pan and the aroma of breakfast being prepared penetrated the air.

The dark haired man, who was scrambling eggs while keeping an eye on the bacon, smiled when arms slipped around his waist; hands resting idly on his hips.

Lips pressed a kiss in his neck and a nose nuzzled right underneath his ear.

"Good morning," Draco murmured and his thumbs leisurely caressed protruding hipbones.

"Morning," Harry hummed and quickly squeezed his husband's right arm. "Want eggs and bacon?" He was already reaching out to grab plates.

"Yes, thanks," the blond mumbled and released the other man, stepping to the side to grab two mugs. "Coffee?"

"Yes, please," Harry muttered and divided the strips of bacon and the fluffy scrambled eggs between the two plates, bringing them over to the table.

Two steaming mugs filled with coffee joined the plates and soon the two men were enjoying their breakfast.

"What are your plans for today?" Draco inquired, taking careful sips of his coffee.

"I'm taking Scorpius with me to the mall; I still need to buy some presents," Harry answered and hid a yawn behind his hand.

Grey eyes regarded him suspiciously.

"What?" he retorted, slightly defensively, and raised an eyebrow.

"You're not going to visit that son of a bitch again, are you?" Draco demanded; a hint of a growl resounding in his voice. Pale fingers tightened around his knife and the blond visibly clenched his jaw.

"Merlin, Draco, let it go!" Harry groaned and ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. "That was one time!"

"And that was one time too many," Draco ground out; anger lightening up his eyes.

"It's not like it would be the same person," Harry muttered petulantly and sighed.

"Harry," Draco growled in warning.

"You're ridiculous." Harry rolled his eyes, but held up his hands in a sign of defeat.

Draco still eyed him warily, but calmed down again. "I'll be home at four today," he announced lightly.

"Not many clients today?" Harry questioned surprised and lowered his mug.

"No, figured I would take some time off." Draco shrugged and a faint smile lingered around his lips.

Harry blinked, but nodded. It wasn't as if he didn't like having his partner home sooner.

* * *

Half an hour later, Draco was dressed and left to his lab after giving Harry a kiss.

Not long after the blond man had left, a young boy with messy, dark hair appeared in the doorway of the kitchen, rubbing small fists in his eyes. Light grey eyes looked at Harry sleepily.

"Good morning, Scorpius," Harry smiled and stood up. "What do you want to eat?"

His five year old son walked to the table and climbed on the chair, yawning loudly. "Eggs, daddy," he answered and blinked, looking around the kitchen. "Where's papa?"

"Papa has already left for work, sweetheart," Harry replied and cracked two eggs in the sizzling pan to make them sunny side up. He placed a glass filled with milk in front of his son before he returned to the pan.

"We go see Santa Claus today?" Scorpius asked and he sounded more awake now.

Turning around with the plate containing the eggs, the older man clucked his tongue when he noticed some milk spilled on the table and Scorpius smiled sheepishly. Removing the spilt milk with a Vanish charm, he put down the plate and asked, "You still want to go?"

Scorpius nodded vigorously; his eyes wide with brimming excitement. "Yes, daddy! Aunt Mione says he gives presents!"

Harry chuckled and sat down again; one hand resting on his stomach. "If you still want to, then we'll go after you have eaten."

Scorpius beamed and started attacking his eggs; clearly eager to leave soon. He somehow managed to spill some of the egg yolk on the table in his enthusiasm, but Harry just smiled indulgently and started collecting the dirty dishes, bringing them to the sink. A quick flick of his wand and water started to pour in the sink; a sharp twist of his wrist and lemon scented dish soap was added.

"I'm done, daddy," Scorpius announced and he kicked the table with his leg.

"No kicking the table," Harry admonished him and levitated his son's dishes to the sink as well, where the first dishes were being dried. "Go dress, then we'll leave."

He couldn't supress a smile when Scorpius whooped in joy and scrambled out of the kitchen, barely avoiding Felix, the tabby cat they had rescued from the streets three years ago. Felix meowed sharply in reproach after being nearly run over, but the boy didn't pay him any attention, hurrying to his room to change his clothes.

Upon entering the kitchen, Felix meowed once again, staring balefully at Harry, as if he was complaining about the rough treatment.

"I know, Felix. He was a bit too enthusiastic," Harry said soothingly with an amused chuckle.

The cat grumbled and jumped on a vacant seat, pawing at the table with an insistent meow.

Green eyes rolled in fond exasperation, but Harry bent down slightly and opened one of the cabinets, in which they kept the cat food. As soon as Felix heard the tell-tale sound of a can being opened, he jumped off the chair and wound himself around Harry's legs, loudly purring.

"Didn't notice it was morning already, huh?" he murmured amused and placed the small plate with the cat food in front of Felix, grimacing slightly at the smell.

The tabby cat attacked his food with gusto.

"I'm ready, daddy!" Scorpius announced brightly and appeared in the doorway, bracing himself against the doorjamb. He had pulled on his favourite red sweater with a smiling star stitched in the middle and a pair of dark grey trousers. Dark blue sneakers adorned his feet.

"Yeah? Then we can go," Harry grinned and directed the last dry pan to its rightful place, before he slid his wand in his pocket.

After putting on their coats and slipping on their scarves, they left the house.

"Remember, Scorpius, we can't talk about magic until we're back home, okay?" Harry reminded his son and then winked, continuing in a tone of conspiracy, "And this is a secret between us two only."

Scorpius nodded solemnly and put a finger on his lips. "I know, daddy. Papa no like Santa, so I have to be sshh."

"Exactly," the older man smiled and squeezed the small hand in his softly.

"But Santa is nice, right?" Scorpius questioned and began skipping next to his father.

"Of course he's nice," Harry soothed, though inwardly he grimaced when he recalled his previous experience with a Santa Claus. That one had been way too touchy-feely, but it wasn't as if every Santa was like that. Besides, he had heard that that particular bloke had been banned from the mall after he had been caught harassing multiple women and men. Since then someone else had taken up the role of Santa. Harry wasn't sorry at all to hear that; the bastard had it coming after the way he had treated people.

The closer they got to the mall, the more eager Scorpius became until he was practically tugging on Harry's hand, urging him to go faster. The older man smiled indulgently and pulled his jacket tighter around him. It was colder than he had expected and he found himself longing for a cup of hot chocolate.

Hot air blasted over them when they walked into the shopping centre and they were immediately greeted by the loud chatter of other people and salespeople distributing flyers of their stores. All stores were decked out with Christmas decoration and in the middle of the ground floor stood a large, decorated Christmas tree with fake presents placed underneath it.

Scorpius' head swivelled back and forth, taking in all the stores, the glittering lights and pouted. "Where's Santa, daddy?" he questioned loudly as they made their way to the escalator, dodging around several people.

Two women near them cooed and chuckled, before the brunette said, "Just follow the escalator, darling. Santa is on the first floor." She winked and pointed upwards; her bag slipped into the crease of her elbow with that action.

"Thank you!" Scorpius beamed and looked at Harry with wide eyes. "Daddy, need to go up!"

"So I've heard," Harry replied dryly and nodded politely to the two women before they stepped on the escalator behind an elderly couple.

His son softly oh'ed as he looked down at the moving staircase; fascination clearly visible in his eyes.

They got off the escalator without any trouble to Harry's relief; he hadn't known whether Scorpius would have been able to step on the floor on time and had already been prepared to lift him up.

As soon as the dark haired boy caught sight of Santa Claus – Hermione had been all too happy to show pictures of Santa to the young boy weeks ago – he started jumping up and down, pointing at the man. "It's Santa, daddy, Santa!" he exclaimed excitedly; his eyes glittering brightly like silver.

"I see him; let's go wait in the queue," Harry chuckled and they stepped behind a mother with two children, of which the youngest was lying in a dark green pram.

The excitement of visiting Santa seemed to temper Scorpius' impatience that usually made an appearance when he had to wait too long in a queue. Harry was actually impressed by this; patience wasn't exactly his son's forte.

The queue moved slowly forwards; a lot of families had shown up and every child wanted to be certain that Santa Claus knew exactly which present they wanted to have. Most parents were content to wait while their children had their turn with Santa, but Harry had noticed a couple of them wearing quite sour faces – it seemed like Christmas cheer was not affecting everyone just yet.

Finally, after a long time of waiting and entertaining Scorpius by asking him to name all types of candy he could think of – which was surprisingly and a bit worryingly a long list – they reached the small gate through which they had to pass to get to Santa Claus.

The two elves – one girl and one boy – stationed at the gate bowed slightly and grinned cheerily at them. Clearly those two had more fun playing Santa's helpers than the ones Harry remembered seeing a couple of years ago.

"And what is your name, sweetie?" the girl asked friendly, lowering herself a bit so that she could face Scorpius instead of looking down on him.

"Scorpius," he chirped and hopped from one foot to the other one, clearly becoming too impatient to stand still for much longer.

"Well, Scorpius, Santa is ready to see you now," the boy smiled and waved him through.

Instantly Scorpius shot forwards, practically flying over the couple of steps that led to the small podium on which Santa sat in his big, red chair. Harry followed at a more sedated pace, smiling fondly as his son squirmed on Santa's lap. His cheeks – still slightly chubby, though it was becoming obvious that he had inherited Draco's sharp cheekbones – were flushed red with excitement and his grey eyes glittered madly.

It was a miracle his magic hadn't started acting up yet.

"And Scorpius, have you been a good boy this year?" Santa Claus asked merrily.

"Yes!" Scorpius declared confidently and Harry barely managed to smother his snort.

While his son was quite well behaved in general, he did have his moments when he threw a tantrum so loudly, it made Harry wonder whether there wasn't any Banshee blood in their family. The dark haired man was firmly inclined to believe that the short temper fuse when not getting their way belonged to the Malfoy family – Draco heavily protested that belief every time Harry brought it up.

Santa looked up, apparently having heard Harry, and winked playfully. "Well then, good boys get a gift from Santa!" Keeping one hand on the boy's back to keep him from tumbling off his lap, the man leant over his armchair and rummaged through his large bag until he came up with a modest sized package, wrapped in dark blue paper with a silver bow. "Here you go!"

"Thank you!" Scorpius exclaimed and with a huge grin he accepted the present and jumped off Santa's lap. He immediately ran over to Harry, holding up the present in the air. "Look, daddy, Santa's present for me!"

"Looks like a big present, huh? That's because you've been such a good boy," Harry chuckled and extended his hand. "Let's go home; you can open your present there."

Scorpius looked ready to protest, but after a couple of seconds he clutched his present tightly against his chest and nodded.

As they left Santa's podium behind, a sigh of relief left Harry's chest and his shoulders felt lighter when worry left him. Even though he had insisted to Draco that it had only happened once, he had been wary near this Santa. The chances of this Santa being a pervert like the previous one were small, he acknowledged, but he had still been slightly on edge.

But Scorpius had his present, Harry hadn't been nearly assaulted by Santa, so everything had gone like it should have gone. Now they could return home and his son would get to play with one present already.

* * *

Searching for the escalator that would take them to the ground floor again took a short while and by the time Harry finally spotted the damn thing, his bladder sent signals to his brain that if he didn't empty it _right now_ , he would have to deal with wet trousers.

"Shit," he muttered underneath his breath, then said louder, "Scorpius, I have to go to the bathroom for a bit. Can you wait by the sink?"

Grey eyes blinked surprised, but his son nodded and followed him inside the bathroom. It wasn't exactly a large one; it had two small sinks, one soap dispenser and four urinals and was currently empty aside from Harry and Scorpius. The dark haired man looked doubtfully at the grimy floor and the sinks that were looking more grey than white, but figured that he had no choice. The filth wasn't that overwhelming – well, aside from the stench; _Merlin, that was awful_ – and his bladder wasn't willing to wait until they were back home.

Breathing shallowly through his mouth – he could hear Scorpius muttering a disgusted "Ew!" behind him – he quickly unzipped his trousers and did his business. After zipping up again, he washed his hands thoroughly with the liquid soap that smelt vaguely like lemon and grabbed Scorpius' hand again.

"All right, now we can go home," he muttered and pushed against the door – only to nearly walk straight into Santa. "Oh, sorry! I didn't know you were behind this door!" he quickly apologised, stepping out of the way. At least he hadn't flung the door in Santa's face.

Even through the fake beard, the bright grin on the man's face was visible. Instead of entering the bathroom, like Harry had expected him to do, the man leant forwards a bit, placing one hand on the wall right next to Harry's head.

"Eh, hi. Do you need something?" Harry asked befuddled and slightly wary. He didn't feel exactly threatened – what could that guy do to him anyway? – but all his senses were on high alert.

"It's my break; the mall gives me one hour and a half before I need to go back and I was wondering whether you would want to spend that break with me?" the guy suggested lightly and winked. "I've got something special in the sack for you," he added with a slight leer. He seemed to have forgotten about Scorpius' presence completely.

Oh Merlin, this couldn't be happening. This seriously couldn't be happening to him _again_. What was it with Santa's and them trying to get into his pants? Seriously, he wasn't that special! How was it possible to be accosted twice by two different Santa's in the same mall? Was there something with that character or the air in this place that made those idiots think that they could get laid with him?

"Sorry, but I'm already taken," Harry smiled thinly and flashed his wedding ring. "Come on, Scorpius, let's …"

"I won't tell if you don't," the man smirked and stepped even closer to Harry. "Santa gives presents to everyone who has been good, you know? I'm sure we can find some suitable toy for you."

"How about you leave now, before I make you regret it?" Harry said through gritted teeth; his skin practically crawling at the god awful pick-up lines this bastard was spouting. Did he seriously think anyone would respond to those lines?

"I've always liked to tame," the man grinned lewdly and clamped his arm around Harry's waist before the dark haired man could react.

"DON'T TOUCH DADDY OR MY SISTER!" Scorpius screeched furiously and before Harry could even think of holding him back, Scorpius shot forwards and harshly kicked Santa against his leg before he swung his leg up and hit him straight in his balls.

The man instantly dropped down on the floor, clutching his groin as he moaned in pain; his face turning red as some tears escaped his eyes.

"Let's go, Scorpius," Harry muttered dumbfounded and before any of the bystanders – who were rapidly approaching the bathroom to figure out what had happened to Santa – could stop him, he marched to the escalator and hurried out of the mall; his son resting on his hip.

The cold wind stung his face when he started the walk back home and he shivered; the sudden change between warmth and cold a shock to his system.

"Well, I guess we won't visit that particular mall ever again," Harry muttered and stopped for a moment to put his son back on the ground. "Sweetie, take my hand."

Tearful, grey eyes gazed up at him worriedly. "Is daddy mad?" Scorpius asked in a small voice.

"I should be, considering you kicked someone," Harry smiled ruefully. "But honestly he had it coming. He surprised me when he grabbed me."

A dark blue shoe kicked against a small pile of dead leaves. "Santa is mean. Not allowed to hurt daddy or my sister," the little boy stated petulantly, as if he wanted to defend his actions.

The older man thought about explaining how only that particular Santa was mean, but he figured he would only end up confusing his son if he had to tell him that Santa was played by different people, because he didn't exist. Instead, he knelt down and – ignoring how cold the ground felt through his jeans – he kissed Scorpius' forehead and smiled. "Well, I'm proud that you helped me. Daddy's little protector."

"I'm not little," Scorpius protested, but his denial was ruined by the beaming smile on his face. "Papa says I have to protect my little sister when she's hurt." Worry made his smile wilt again. "Is my sister hurt?"

"No, she's fine," Harry reassured him and almost absentmindedly brushed his hand across the gentle swell of his stomach. "You protected her really well," he praised him and was rewarded with another beaming smile. He rose up again and took Scorpius' hand in his once more. "Now let's go home and drink some hot chocolate."

"Okay, daddy!" Scorpius chirped and began skipping next to him again.

They had just turned into the street where they lived when Harry asked curiously, "Who taught you how to kick like that, sweetie?"

"Aunt 'Mione," Scorpius replied innocently. "She says I have to kick mean people like that."

Green eyes blinked and the older wizard shook his head in weary amusement.

It seemed like he and Hermione needed to have a little talk about what she taught his son.

* * *

 _Almost._

He had almost got through the entire evening without Draco being the wiser about the Santa incident.

Naturally he hadn't counted on his son's pride of being the one who had protected his unborn sister. Really, he couldn't blame his son for wanting to inform his papa that he had protected his sister like the blond had told him to, but that left him with a very awkward situation.

" … and because Santa was mean, I kicked him, papa! Santa not allowed to hurt my sister!" Scorpius huffed and crossed his arms. Then added, "Or daddy! Right, papa?"

The entire afternoon had passed without the small boy even making one mention about their trip, but something during dinner seemed to have triggered the memory and before Harry could even cut off Scorpius' babbling and ask him something else to distract him, the young boy was telling his other father in full detail what had happened during their trip to the mall this morning. The moment the word ' _Santa_ ' had left Scorpius' mouth, Draco's face had darkened, but the five year old had been oblivious to that look and had continued to chatter about what Santa had done.

And even though Harry kept his eyes carefully averted to the table, he could feel silver grey eyes boring a hole into his head.

Shit, this wouldn't end well.

"You're right, Scorpius, Santa isn't allowed to hurt your sister or your daddy. You did a very good job today," Draco praised him and when Harry glanced at their son, he couldn't help but smile softly when he noticed his cheeks flushed with pride and the dark haired boy looked down bashfully.

Draco wasn't as cold as his father, but out of the two of them Harry was more willing to compliment their son. That made these moments of praise all the more endearing to watch.

His husband glanced at the clock briefly. "It's time for you to go to sleep, Scorpius," he announced and smiled. "I'll read you a story after you have brushed your teeth, okay?"

"Okay!" Scorpius grinned and jumped off his chair, toddling over to Harry with his arms outstretched.

Knowing the ritual, Harry bent down and hugged Scorpius, giving him a kiss on his forehead while he received his own wet kiss on his cheek. "Sweet dreams, Scorpius," he smiled.

"Night, daddy!" With one last hug, Scorpius left the room, hurrying towards his bedroom so that he could pick out his bedtime story before he went to brush his teeth.

With their son gone now, Harry hastily stood up and gathered the dirty dishes, levitating them towards the sink.

"I thought you promised me you wouldn't visit Santa again?" Draco said coolly and he pushed his chair back with a soft screeching sound.

Pursing his lips, Harry flickered his eyes at him and muttered petulantly, "Well, technically I never really made that promise."

"Yes, and look what happened. _Again_ ," the blond spat and glowered. "Really, Harry, I don't understand why it is so difficult for you to just stay out of trouble."

The water made a loud clattering sound when it hit their glasses.

The dark haired man crossed his arms and leant against the wall, scowling at his husband. "It wasn't that bad, okay? It's not like I was really attacked and I could …"

"Is that why Scorpius just told me that that bastard was touching you?" Draco's body was filled with tension. "What was that about Santa giving you a toy anyway?"

"Just him being an arrogant arsehole, nothing more. He thought …"

"Papa, I got a story!" Scorpius yelled from the top of the staircase.

Draco rolled his shoulders and furrowed his eyebrows. "This conversation isn't over yet," he warned and stalked out of the kitchen.

"I figured," Harry muttered underneath his breath and rubbed wearily over the back of his neck. He had already decided never to visit Santa again – Scorpius had actually insisted on that, saying he didn't want mean Santa to hurt his daddy again – so he wasn't in the mood for more scolding from his husband.

As if it was his fault that Santa couldn't keep his hands to himself! Really, Harry would have liked nothing more than for that bloke to just keep doing his job as the jolly old man who delivered presents to children; it wasn't as if he enjoyed being harassed by that idiot!

"Should have hexed off Santa's balls," he muttered darkly.

With jerky movements he cleaned up the rest of the kitchen and directed the dried dishes to their appropriate place, turning off the lights when he walked upstairs. Passing Scorpius' room, he briefly smiled when he heard Draco imitating the heavy voice of a dragon. Calming down slightly, – it was hard to stay mad at a man who was willing to speak in silly voices to entertain their son – he continued walking to his bedroom, intent on changing into his pyjamas. He still had a book waiting for him in the living room and nothing was better to relax than reading a good novel in front of the fire in his comfortable pyjamas.

He had just pulled off his sweater, leaving him in his trousers and white shirt, when the door opened further and Draco slipped inside, closing the door behind him.

Before the blond could even open his mouth, Harry sighed and said, "Look, I shouldn't have kept this visit from you, but I figured that since the previous guy was banned, it wouldn't be bad to visit Santa again. Obviously, something must be wrong with either the costume or the air there, because Santa was being a prick again, but that's not my fault! Trust me, he pissed me off a lot. I'm not planning on ever visiting Santa again, so no need to continue your prissy act."

An eyebrow was raised in reply. "Prissy act?" Draco repeated incredulously and suddenly he was in front of Harry, his arms slipping around his waist. "I'm not prissy; I'm pissed that some bastard thought he had the right to touch you," he hissed and took a step forwards, forcing Harry to take one backwards until somehow Draco had managed to push him against the wall next to the closed door. How had that happened?

"When it is more than clear that you're taken!" Draco snarled and linked their hands together, raising them until the moonlight caught their shining wedding rings. "Not to mention this sign." His other hand slid underneath Harry's shirt, cupping his five month pregnant belly.

"The mall is full of Muggles," Harry murmured, slightly breathless at the sight of burning silver in front of him. "Do you really think I'm going to prance around there with my stomach on full display?"

"Doesn't matter," Draco growled and the other man shivered when a nose nuzzled in his neck; hot lips tracing patterns over his sensitive skin. "He shouldn't have touched you at all, because you're mine!"

Green eyes became half lidded as the first stirrings of arousal warmed him from inside. He would never admit it to the blond, but he secretly liked it very much when Draco showed his possessive, jealous side. It was a guilty pleasure of him; something that he liked to indulge in sometimes. Draco never made it a secret how much he loved and wanted Harry, but well, that was the most obvious during his possessive moments.

"I'm yours, hm?" Harry hummed and he carded a hand through fine, blond hair; tightening around a couple of locks so that he could pull back Draco's head and make him look at him. "Care to remind me?"

Silver grey eyes flashed up at the challenge and the next moment their mouths were mashed together as impatient hands tore off their clothes.

Harry didn't make it back down in the living room for the rest of the evening and couldn't enjoy reading his book in front of the fire.

Instead he got to enjoy a different kind of fire; a fire that swept over him, possessed him completely and left him boneless and weak, trembling in its after wake as he sought to catch his breath while he kept his body entwined with that of his lover.

He enjoyed this type of fire a lot more.

* * *

When Hermione asked a couple of days later how the visit with Santa had gone, she got to hear from a very outraged Scorpius that he would never want to visit Santa again, because he was a very mean person.

Harry just shrugged in reply to her bewildered face and answered, as he idly rubbed over his ring, "It turns out that Malfoys really do not get along with Santa."

And really, he couldn't blame his husband and son for that.

* * *

 **AN2: What Harry doesn't know, is that Draco went to that mall the next day and made sure that Santa would never think of harrassing another person ever again.**

 **Please let me know what you thought of it in a review; should you spot any mistakes, please point them out to me!**

 **Cuddles**

 **Melissa**

 **P.S. For more information about my upcoming and posted stories, please visit my profile.**


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